The Enma's Vacation
by UnendingEmpire
Summary: At the order of Head Yama, the great Yamaxanadu Eiki Shiki has been given the order to take a ten-day vacation. To top this off, she's being assigned a partner to ensure that she doesn't try to do her job during these ten days; an expert in the art of slacking off...


**Starting new fanfics when others are just starting seems to be a thing I do a lot ^_^;**

**I should really try to stick to ONE fanfic at a time, though doing that is something my restless mind can't ever do. If somebody were to be able to get my brain to slow down and be calm, I could surely do it, but my mind is constantly processing countless thoughts and running over dozens of scenarios at any given time, and that's excluding a near-constant music input, writing, playing Touhou (when I actually play it) and the big thing that's been taking over my spare time in the last week or two; making new music!**

**For this reason, I usually can't stick to one fanfic for more than a couple of weeks, if that. Hopefully, I don't become the kind of writer where the readers expect me to abandon a fanfic in its early stages. When that day comes, I've REALLY lost it as a writer.**

* * *

"Condemned as guilty," shouted the highest judge of paradise, Yamaxanadu Eiki Shiki, as the convicted soul was dragged away to Hell. "Next!" …nobody was showing up. Was Komachi slacking off _again?_ This would be the tenth time in the last seven days; a record even for Komachi. Eiki would have to make herself perfectly clear in how all shinigami absolutely had to do their duties so that Yama like Eiki could judge the souls of the dead. Without the shinigami, there was a blank spot between dying and being judged, and only shinigami were able to fill that blank; only they and their boats could touch the Sanzu River without sinking to the bottom.

Once, about 20 years ago, a group of five or ten professional divers in the outside world died, and the Yama (not Eiki, who rarely judged thanks to Komachi slacking off) saw a chance to find out just what was at the bottom of the Sanzu River. The divers were tied to ropes, on the other end of which was the boat of the shinigami of that Yama. The Yama responsible for this ridiculous experiment personally joined this voyage in their curiosity, and because he wanted to be the first to hear what was down there. The divers, the shinigami, and the Yama, were never heard from again. Eiki understood what that meant; don't screw around with the Sanzu River. However, failing to ferry souls across it was just as bad, so Eiki would have to go lecture Komachi once again on the importance of her duties.

And just then; just as Eiki got up to find and lecture Komachi, the big-chested shinigami herself came running up to Eiki's seat of power. "Eiki-sama," she shouted. "You've got orders! From Head Yama himself!" Reaching into her cleavage, Komachi fished around for a second or two, then pulled out a paper envelope sealed with the distinct symbol of Head Yama. He was the big boss of the Yama, and in all worlds, his word was absolute law. Many, both Yama and shinigami alike, were pretty sure that Eiki and Head Yama were on friendly terms because of their similar mindsets. "You won't believe it!"

"I won't, will I? We'll see about that," Eiki said as she opened up the envelope. "And here I was about to lecture you for slacking off, and it seems you've been detained in the office of Head Yama this whole time." Putting on the set of reading glasses next to Eiki's trusty Rod of Remorse, the Yama began reading aloud as she tended to, "Yamaxanadu Eiki Shiki. I, Head Yama, am hereby issuing a direct command as your superior, as well as a suggestion as your friend. You have been working every day for sixteen hours a day without fail for the last 5,000 years, which has forced me to hand down these orders. Starting tomorrow, you are to…_take a ten-day vacation?_" The irony! Komachi the slacker was in the office of Head Yama, and now delivered orders to the busybody Eiki that specifically told her to take a few days off! That irony alone was nearly enough to make Komachi laugh, were Eiki's presence not scaring her out of it. "Furthermore, I'm issuing to you a partner who will ensure that you do not attempt to perform your duties during these ten days. Even Yama need breaks, and you will surely find that your assigned vacation partner is an expert in the field of taking breaks. You should probably start packing. Signed, Head Yama…"

"There's more," Komachi said, fishing back into her cleavage and pulling out another envelope with the same seal. "I haven't read this yet, but Head Yama had orders for me, too. I don't think I have to read it, though; we both probably can put two and two together~"

"Read it," Eiki demanded. "It was issued by Head Yama; reading the orders is essential, whether you know the contents already or not."

"Alright, alright…" Komachi opened up the envelope, and cleared her throat to read her orders aloud for her Yama to hear. "Class One Shinigami Komachi Onozuka. I, Head Yama, am hereby issuing a command in the stead of your superior - Yamaxanadu Eiki Shiki - who is preparing for a ten-day vacation at my orders. Starting tomorrow, you are to accompany Judge Shiki on her vacation and ensure that she does not attempt to fulfill her duties as a Yama. You are also to assist her in packing today in preparation for her vacation, though it would be wise to not neglect your own packing. I give this duty to you not just because you are Judge Shiki's shinigami, but also because you alone have gathered more complaints than every other shinigami combined in relation to neglecting your duties, so it can only be assumed that you are an expert slacker. Please ensure that Judge Shiki does not attempt to perform her duties during her vacation. Signed, Head Yama."

"You've gathered more negligence complaints than _all the others combined?_" Even if Eiki hated her shinigami slacking off relentlessly, even the great Yamaxanadu had to be at least a little impressed with that feat. "I'm not sure whether I should be impressed or ashamed with you in that regard."

"How about both?"

"We've got packing to do."

"Oh, one more thing."

"Yes? What else did Head Yama say?"

"It's not on paper, but Head Yama said he also gave me these orders because you need to lighten up, and he thinks I'm the best person to make it happen."

"…we've got packing to do," Eiki repeated. "Go home, and meet me at my office-"

"Locked down." For the third time, Komachi's hand began fishing around between her breasts, this time pulling out a third paper. Unlike the other two thus far, this one had already been opened, and didn't have Head Yama's seal on it. Instead, it was the seal of the Head Yama's shinigami; Grim Reaper. "I got orders from Grim. See?"

"I suppose that means you're stepping up in the ranks…though a slacker like you couldn't possibly be ascending that fast."

"He said to cut you off from all your work." Komachi cleared her throat, was about to start reading the paper upside-down, flipped it over, then began. "Komachi Onozuka, Class One Shinigami. If you are reading this, then I have given you an order, and expect you to get right to it. In addition to orders you will soon be receiving from Head Yama, I want you to go to the office of Yamaxanadu Eiki Shiki, and lock the place down completely. The key has been provided to you in this envelope, and will disintegrate when its purpose is fulfilled. You are to cut Eiki Shiki off from any access to her workplace beyond her courtroom, then go see Head Yama in his office. Signed, Grim Reaper, Head Shinigami."

"I see. Very well then. When you finish packing, meet me at my house, and _then_ we'll take off on this vacation."

"Alright! We're being ordered to take a vacation!" With that, Komachi ran off to her own home to get her own packing done. There was still one thing she didn't get, though, and she was just reminded of it because of Grim's orders. How come every Yama had a courtroom _and_ an office, and how come they were always so far apart from each other? Perhaps it was to add to the weight of responsibility for them. A shinigami had just their boat and their scythe to worry about when on the job, and some lower-ranked shinigami weren't even authorized to have scythes in the first place! The whole system sometimes left Komachi confused, but for ten whole days, she wouldn't have to worry about it…

Not that she worried about it in the first place. Or her job, for that matter.

* * *

**Later; Eiki****'****s house****…**

_Knock__…_

"Such a lazy knock," Eiki commented, making her way down the stairs to answer the door. "No doubt it's…" _Creak__…_ "Ah, Komachi. I had a feeling it was you."

"I'm here to help you pack~"

"Finished your own packing that fast, huh? I'm amazed how much of a workaholic you become when it involves you taking a big break. Come on in, then." Eiki stepped aside to make room for the shinigami that would be accompanying her on the vacation and the big blue suitcase that followed Komachi through the door. "I nearly finished my own packing, as well."

"What'd you pack?"

"The basics. Rod of Remorse, Cleansed Mirror, notepad, reading glasses…those sorts of things."

"I'll only let two of those things go with you! And it's not going to be any of your Yama stuff, either!"

"I beg your pardon?"

"Head Yama gave me orders to make sure you didn't even think about your job during your big vacation, and as much of a slacker as I may be, I have every intention of making sure you have _fun_ on your break! Follow me," Komachi said, dragging her Yama by the arm up the stairs and into Eiki's room. Komachi had never been here before, but the layouts of all Higan houses were about the same, give or take an extra bedroom here or a bigger kitchen there.

Once the two were in Eiki's room, Komachi threw open the Yama's green suitcase to see the contents. The Rod of Remorse, her Cleansed Mirror, a pair of reading glasses, a notepad, and three identical Yama uniforms! For a vacation, this kind of luggage was unforgivable! "Komachi's Vacation Lessons: Lesson One. When you're going on vacation, you don't bring work stuff with you!" Emptying out Eiki's suitcase of all its contents except the reading glasses and the notepad, Komachi said "You want to pack things you'll enjoy!"

"I enjoy my work."

"You're supposed to _not_ work!"

"_Fine._ What would _you_ pack, then?"

"Let's see…" Komachi swung open Eiki's closet, and started looking around.

"Hey! That's my private property!"

"This is…this is…"

"Yes? What is it?"

"It's heart-breaking," Komachi near-wept. "Your whole closet; _every set of clothing you have_ is nothing but Yama uniforms. Don't you have any casual clothes? You know, shirts, skirts, _normal people clothes?_"

"I have a big closet," Eiki explained, walking up to her closet and moving the uniforms to the sides, making sure not to wrinkle them. Behind those uniforms lied the rest of Eiki's closet; the things she didn't put on display or wear…ever.

"Now we're talking!" Komachi ran into the deeper part of the closet, fishing around through countless different kinds of casual clothing. Why did Eiki have so many average clothes and not wear them? "A-ha! Here's what I was looking for!" The red-haired shinigami turned to face her Yama, holding a small blue swimsuit. The whole thing was a one-piece swimsuit that zipped up in the back, but short of that, it was nothing special at all. "Packing a swimsuit is an absolute _must_ if you're taking a vacation! You might find a swimming pool, or a nice lake, or you may even go to the beach!"

"…" Already, Eiki had this feeling, deep in her gut. She wouldn't enjoy being on vacation, especially for ten whole days. As Komachi continued bolting in and out of the Yama's closet with set after set of casual clothing, her hopes for the vacation sunk lower and lower. All the clothes Komachi was packing were useless! A swimsuit? Casual clothing? There was no place for them to be worn by a Yama! Eiki wanted to shout and scream at her shinigami, and explain the whole thing, including how Eiki would rather spend her vacation. However, she knew that doing so would be objecting to the orders of Head Yama himself. For that reason and that reason alone, Eiki would let Komachi continue packing for her.

* * *

**I just realized I didn't talk about this fanfic at all in my starting notes ^_^;**

**Komachi and Eiki aren't seen very often in my fanfics, or any fanfics or ANY Touhou fan-material at all for that matter. Because of that, we don't see them very often. For that reason, I wanted to do another KomaEiki thing, with my last shot at these two being my one-shot from a while ago. Since then, I've solidified my image of Eiki's personality some, so I know how I want her to act.**

**Before, I tried forcing childish aspects onto Eiki, but now I see how to add those desired traits easily. Eiki is, as I'm hoping to portray her, a serious workaholic who gives herself no spare time, but would have some childish tendencies if she actually had some time off from work. I also want her to be kind of helpless despite her power, not unlike Kaguya, though Komachi can probably hand down far worse ass-kicking than Eirin~**

**I'm hoping that by the end of the fanfic, a cute kind of romance appears between Eiki and Komachi. But, as some of my frequent readers can tell you, I tend to lose control of the fanfics that really make it. It's the ones I try to control that fail…**

**Wait, does that mean a lot of my newer ones are doomed? Oh no!**


End file.
